A Very Crimson Christmas (Crimson, Colorado 4) Read online

  That was part of why he hadn’t returned to Crimson throughout the years. He liked to think he’d gotten over her but knew he’d never be able to control his physical reaction to her. She could be standing in front of him wearing a potato sack and his body would come to life.

  When she glanced in his direction, she must have seen something in his eyes because hers darkened in response, faint spots of color appearing on her cheeks.

  “You’re not using the cane,” she said, turning to Ruth with a smile. “How does your hip feel?”

  “Like it was getting rusty,” the older woman answered. “It’s too crowded to bother with the cane in here.” She took the cookie from Austin. “And I didn’t want to miss my chance at an early dessert.”

  “Do you want punch?” he asked. “I can pour you a glass.”

  Ruth shook her head. “I’ll stick with just the cookie. But thank you, Austin. I wish all the boys I’ve known through the years had your good manners.” She threw a look at Liam.

  “I was too busy getting in trouble to worry about manners,” he told her.

  “You turned out okay.”

  “I give you credit for that,” he said honestly.

  “Always so sweet,” she whispered and dabbed at the corner of her eye. “Liam’s going to stay in town for the holidays. Isn’t that wonderful?”

  “Wonderful,” Natalie repeated, her voice sounding dazed. “You can take that much time off work?”

  “I’ll work from here.” He took a glass of punch from the table, wishing he didn’t care that his old girlfriend wasn’t excited for him to remain close.

  “You used to love Christmas,” Ruth said, patting his arm. “This will be perfect. There are so many activities around here over the holidays.”

  “I get two weeks off school,” Austin announced. “Maybe we can all do some fun stuff together when Mom isn’t working. You guys used to hang out a lot, right?”

  He saw Natalie take a small step back, almost as if she’d been punched in the gut. He knew the feeling. “Sounds great, buddy. I’m looking forward to seeing old friends in town.” He turned to Ruth. “In fact, Jason Crenshaw wants to go snowmobiling up on the mountain this weekend if we get that new snow they’re predicting. Do you still have helmets at the farm?”

  “I do.”

  Austin jumped up and down in front of him. “Can I come? I’ve always wanted to try snowmobiling. Some of my friends at school go with their dads.”

  “Sure,” Liam answered automatically. Natalie gave a sharp shake of her head behind Austin. “I mean,” he amended, “if it’s okay with your mom.”

  The boy whirled around. “It’s okay, Mom. Josh said we could go sometime out on Crimson Ranch when they weren’t busy. Now Liam can take me.”

  Natalie crossed her arms over her chest. Her friends, Josh and Sara Travers, owned the guest ranch outside of town. While she trusted them to keep her precious boy safe, Crimson Ranch was popular enough that Josh would be hard-pressed to find the free time to take her son snowmobiling. That had definitely made it easier to say yes to Austin in the first place. “I don’t know. It’s pretty dangerous.”

  “Liam and Mr. Crenshaw will make sure I’m okay.”

  “You could come, too.” Liam snapped shut his mouth, but the words were already out. What the hell possessed him to make that offer? He’d been looking forward to letting off some steam on the mountain with his buddy. Not hosting a pseudo-family outing.

  “I don’t want to leave Ruth for so long,”

  “Of course you should go,” Ruth argued. “I can have one of the nurses from the home-care agency fill in if I need it. Besides, I’m feeling much better.”

  “Please, Mom.”

  The teacher from Austin’s class called the kids to gather at the door. Austin tugged on Natalie’s arm. “Ple-eease.”

  “Fine.” Natalie blew out a breath. “We’ll both go.”

  “Yes! You’re the best mom ever.” Austin threw his arms around Natalie, then hurried off to line up with his class.

  “It’s fine,” Liam said when Natalie shot him a glare.

  “Didn’t you total the snowmobile Jase’s dad owned back in high school?”

  “I’m going to walk with Harold back to his room,” Ruth said quickly, waving to the older man as she hobbled away.

  “I can’t believe she ditched me,” Liam muttered, then offered Natalie a tentative smile. “I was young and stupid then.”

  “Now you’re older.” Natalie continued to stare at him, arms crossed, the toe of her purple clog tapping on the floor.

  “And smarter.”

  “I don’t want anything to happen to Austin,” she said after a moment. “He’s all I’ve got.”

  She didn’t meet his gaze as she said the words, but he could see how much they cost her. He felt a rush of emotion and a spark of envy. It was irrational and unfair, but Liam didn’t have anything—anyone—so precious to him in his life. He hadn’t since he’d left Crimson.

  “I’ll keep him safe, Natalie.” He couldn’t stop himself from touching her, just a finger on the delicate bone at her wrist. “I’ll keep both of you safe.”

  She went still as his finger grazed her skin. “I’m overreacting,” she said after a moment, shifting away from his touch. “It will be fun. Thank you for including us.” The words were as stiff as her body language, but Liam didn’t press her on it. He wasn’t sure what, if anything, he wanted from Natalie again—but had an entire holiday season to figure it out.

  Chapter Five

  “Are you sure you don’t want a beer or a glass of wine?”

  “Mom, it’s not even five o’clock.”

  Her mother sat the cup of coffee Natalie had requested on the shiny bar. “It’s five o’clock somewhere,” she sang in her gravelly alto. “Besides, Lou isn’t here so I can give you a drink on the house. One of the perks of the job.”

  Natalie was pretty sure Lou Bristol, the owner of Crimson’s local bar, The Tavern, would comp her a drink if he were there. Natalie’s mother, Trudy, had worked for Lou since Natalie was a girl. She’d spent hours in the corner of the bar, playing on the same pinball machine that currently fascinated Austin.

  “Have you finished your homework?” she called to her son. The bar was empty save for a couple of regulars who were used to seeing her stop by to visit her mom. It was easier to spend a few minutes with Trudy here than to get stuck in her mother’s cramped apartment for an entire evening.

  “Yep,” Austin answered, shoving a handful of popcorn into his mouth before shooting the pinball once more.

  “You’re too hard on him,” Trudy said as she stacked glasses. “I never hassled you about homework.”

  You never paid enough attention to realize I had homework, Natalie wanted to answer, but took a long drink of the bitter coffee instead. Normally she wouldn’t have caffeine so late in the afternoon, but she was behind on making jewelry for the art fair that was part of the town’s big Winterfest event. It was going to be a late night.

  “Austin had his school concert at the senior center today.” She reached out to straighten a pile of cardboard coasters at the edge of the bar. “They’re going to do an evening performance right before school lets out for winter break if you want to come.”

  Her mother shrugged. “Maybe. I’m taking on extra shifts so some of the girls can have time off for the holidays. I can use the money right before Christmas.” She dangled her arm in front of Natalie, wiggling her fingers. “Check out these new rings I got from one of those home shopping channels. They were a great deal. Three easy payments. Real gold, too.”

  “Nice, Mom.” Natalie pushed away her cup, the coffee suddenly burning her stomach. She couldn’t remember the last time her mother had been to one of Austin’s school or sporting events. Why did she eve
n bother to ask?

  “Speaking of money, I hear Liam Donovan’s creeping around town again.”

  Natalie rolled her eyes. “He’s not exactly ‘creeping.’ He came to visit Ruth and I guess he’s looking at Crimson for his new company.”

  “All smoke and mirrors,” Trudy said with a sniff. “That boy is trouble. Always has been.”

  “He hasn’t been a boy for a while now, Mom. He’s a successful businessman.”

  Trudy’s kohl-rimmed eyes narrowed and Natalie knew she should shut her mouth. Defending Liam to her mother was an old habit, but it only ever served to make Trudy more suspicious. “He should stick to Aspen or Vail or some other ritzy-titzy town. Crimson doesn’t need his type.”

  “The town council might disagree.” Natalie hopped off her bar stool.

  “Just so long as you stay away from him.”

  “I’ve barely got time to brush my teeth, Mom. Dating isn’t on my list of priorities.”

  “Sweetie, you work too hard.” Her mom reached across the bar and took Natalie’s hand in hers. “I worry about you on your own. Just you and Austin.”

  “We do all right.”

  “All right isn’t good enough for my daughter and grandson.”

  Natalie’s heart clenched at this kernel of motherly concern, then went hard when her mother added, “I talked to Brad the other day.”

  “Don’t start.” Natalie’s head whipped around to make sure Austin was still occupied with the pinball machine. “And don’t mention his name in front of Austin. He shouldn’t hope his deadbeat dad is going come back into his life.”

  “Don’t call your husband a deadbeat, Natalie. How does that reflect on you?”

  Natalie tugged her hand away from her mother’s. “He’s my ex-husband, so he doesn’t reflect on me any longer.”

  “He wants to be a part of your life again. He sounded real sorry for what happened between the two of you. He’s sad and lonely, Nat. He needs support—”

  “Did he happen to mention that I’m already supporting him, Mom?” Natalie pressed her palms to the cool wood of the bar and leaned forward, pitching her voice low so only Trudy could hear. “Did he tell you that I’ve not only been paying off the debts he left me, but also giving him money for his current gambling debt? That every time he calls with a sob story about how much he misses his son, what he means is ‘give me money or I’ll mess up your life again, Nat.’”

  “You don’t know—”

  “I do know.” Natalie practically spit the words. “I know that I haven’t had a true day off in years. That I worry every night about whether I’ll be able to keep the ugly truth about the kind of person his father is from Austin. Do you think I don’t know my son needs a father? But not the kind who’s willing to gamble away our house and savings, then walk out on us. That’s not what either of us needs.”

  “People make mistakes,” Trudy insisted. “If you don’t give someone a second chance—”

  “They won’t have an opportunity to screw you over again.” Natalie shook her head. “I’m not taking Brad back, Mom. Now or ever.”

  Trudy pursed her lips but didn’t say anything more. She didn’t need to. Her mother had a blind spot where Brad was concerned. As much as Trudy hated Liam Donovan, she loved Brad Holt. Her mom had been Brad’s biggest champion since Natalie first dated him, and she wondered how much she’d allowed her mother’s opinion to color her own.

  Maybe she would have seen Brad’s true colors early enough to change course if her relationship with him hadn’t given her a strange bond with her mother. It was a connection she’d always craved but never been able to sustain on her own. But even if she still wanted more from her mom, letting her ex-husband back into her life was not an option.

  She called Austin over to say goodbye to his grandma, then bundled them both up and headed out of the bar. It was still afternoon, but already the light was fading. Lights twinkled up and down Crimson’s main street, with the shops cheerfully decorated for the holidays. Tourism was a big piece of the town’s economy. Crimson benefited from its proximity to Aspen and was also gaining a reputation as a mountain destination in its own right thanks to the hard work of the community.

  “I smell snow,” Austin said as they walked to where Natalie had parked on a side street.

  She smiled. “Me, too, buddy.”

  “Maybe I’ll have a day off tomorrow.”

  “We’ll see.” Natalie knew how much kids looked forward to snow days, but she had a morning shift at the senior center so secretly crossed her fingers that school wouldn’t be canceled.

  “Snow day, snow day,” Austin chanted, raising his fists in the air.

  “Be sure to sleep with a spoon under your pillow,” a voice called from nearby.

  “Good idea, Mr. Crenshaw.”

  Jason Crenshaw came to stand in front of the two of them. “Remember, you can call me Jase. We’re friends, I hope.”

  “I’m going snowmobiling with you and Liam on Saturday,” Austin answered.

  “We’ll have a great time.” He looked at Natalie. “Can I talk to you for a second?”

  “Sure.” She hit a button on her key fob to unlock the door. “Austin, hop in. I’ll be right there.”

  She turned to Jase as the car door shut. “What’s up?” Natalie had known Jason Crenshaw most of her life. They’d actually been neighbors growing up in an apartment complex near the edge of town that housed mostly blue-collar families and ski resort workers who couldn’t afford to live in Aspen.

  Jase had been a skinny, nerdy kid but had grown into his looks and body in recent years, with the easy grace of a man totally comfortable with who he was. But he didn’t look so comfortable now.

  “Are you still thinking of running for mayor next year?” she asked, stuffing her hands in her pockets to ward off the cold.

  He nodded. “That’s actually part of why I need to talk to you. I hate to even bring this up, Natalie, but—”

  Her stomach hit the ground. Jase had been her divorce attorney and was still trying to help her get rid of Brad for good. He was one of the few people who knew the whole truth of what she was facing. “It’s okay, Jase. I should have the rest of your payment by the end of the month. I’ve been trying to save a little extra for Christmas and—”

  “It’s not about the money,” he said quickly. “It’s about Liam.”

  Natalie swallowed. “Liam?”

  “You’ve heard he’s considering Crimson as a headquarters for his new company?”

  “I think everyone between here and Grand Junction has heard that rumor.”

  “It’s a big deal for the town, and we’re going to pull out all the stops to make the deal go through.” He adjusted the wire-rimmed glasses he wore, not making eye contact with her. “I’d appreciate any help you could give on that front.”

  “I don’t have much influence with town council, Jase.”

  “I mean with Liam.”

  “Oh.” Now it was her turn to avoid eye contact. “I’m not sure I have any influence with Liam.”

  “You used to.”

  “A long time ago,” she said softly. “You know how that ended.”

  Jase nodded, looking as if he wanted the sidewalk to swallow him whole. “I’m sorry, Nat. I shouldn’t have said anything. I’d never take advantage of our friendship or put you in a bad situation. It’s just that I don’t want Liam’s old feelings about Crimson to color his decision about the future.”

  “It’s okay.” Natalie took her hand out of her pocket to pat his arm. “You’ve helped me out of a lot of bad situations. I owe you, way more than money.”

  “You don’t,” Jase told her. “Again, I’m sorry. There are so many things I want to see happen in this town, but it’s hard to convince some of the old guard that change can be g
ood. LifeMap coming here could help get the ball rolling. But I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

  “If it comes up, I’ll encourage Liam,” Natalie offered. She really did owe Jase a lot. “Not that he cares about my opinion, but I’ll try.”

  Jase let out a huge breath, his hazel eyes shining behind his glasses. “Thanks, Natalie. That would be a huge help.” He wrapped her in a quick hug. “I hope Liam can put the past behind him. And we’re going to take care of your more recent past, too. We’ll find a way to get Brad out of your life for good.”

  “Thank you,” she whispered, disconcerted to hear Liam’s name brought up along with her ex-husband’s. Two of her biggest mistakes in life. No, that wasn’t exactly true. Her marriage to Brad had been a mistake. Liam was simply a regret. Regret that she hadn’t been enough to hold him and in some deep, secret place that she’d let him walk away so easily.

  * * *

  Liam eased his SUV down the driveway of Ruth’s small farm Saturday morning. Nerves skittered through his stomach and he shook his head. With all he’d accomplished in his life, why did taking his ex-girlfriend and her son snowmobiling make him edgy?

  Natalie had always had that effect on him, from the moment he’d caught sight of her in the hall his first day at the local high school. Even then, she’d been totally self-contained, sure of herself and who she was. Natalie never seemed to need anyone, which had made Liam want her all the more. He’d wanted to break down her walls and know the person behind the tough-girl mask she always wore.

  For a while he thought he had. He’d thought their connection, their love, would be one for the ages, would fill up all the misaligned pieces in his own heart. But like most everyone else he’d let himself love, she’d rejected him. Liam had been a master of disappointing the people around him, then pushing them away.